24 May 2010 12:18am Remembering


Everytime I looked out from my window, I saw this long highway stretching across the skyline venturing out from the unseen scenery faraway, terminated  upon one side of the wall of  my window. I saw huge trucks roaming at high speed, small cars accelerated as to race the sights of other vehicles away from the rear mirrors. I saw the steel tower standing tall amid other vegetations, sending dynamic pulses from one tower to another. Lines of cables hanging in the air, filled the cloudless afternoon sky. As I was looking out from this window, it seemed perfect for one such lonely dreamer to feel again how I was feeling inside. I felt lonely, yet happy because of my freedom.

No longer am I close to this window, no more. I have moved to stay in new place. This new accomodation does not serve the same purpose from the window point of view.  So, basically, seldom or even less than rarely do I look out from my window the way I used to. I think what I`m trying to say is that moving on with life has always been quite easy for me. What is hard for me is to look back at life. I try not to look back but sometimes, the old memories are like some kind of sprouting new shoots, finding nutrients to grow itself on from the back of my brain. There`re many things that time can do. There was a time when my dream was clumsily shattered, time when I was enlightened, time when dream rekindled, time when nothing mattered to me no more, time when all I ever wanted was to follow my dream. Of all these times of my life, there`s only one thing that I truly feel regret for, that is the one whom I used to love.  I probably never really taken him in my life because I was simply being stupid. All I understand is that he was not the one for me, which was quite clear to certain point yet we both ignored it somehow. If, we were never meant to be together, then nothing could be too late or too soon. It just take time to find the right person in my life.

Yeah, everything takes time. Be back tomorrow.

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